OPINION: In praise of leaders who don't "get it"
How much easier and more rewarding is our job when we work with a leader who "gets" communication? I know people who keep moving jobs in search of one. The times when I've worked with leaders like this have been some of the most uplifting and enjoyable points in my career.
But actually, I realized when I was thinking about this issue, that I've learnt far more from working with those who didn't "get it" - as much as I was hugely frustrated at the time. So, perhaps unusually, I thought I would write this column in praise of those leaders who don't always "get" communication and reflect on some of the things I've learned from those I have worked with.
I've learned that a leader doesn't need to be as passionate about communication as I am. This came at a time when everything I tried to get my leader to do was an uphill battle. We always had to go over and over why he had to do it. My realization came when I reflected on how I felt about working with numbers. I don't get them; my preference is for working with people and emotions. I do my accounting, because I have to, but I don't like it, don't understand it, and I just need someone to make it easy for me. I realized my leader had the opposite preference. I stopped my quest to turn him into a communication ambassador and started just trying to make it easier for him to do the things he needed to do to be effective.
I've learned far more from working with leaders who didn't
"get it"
I've learned to look for the insights about why a leader is being "difficult". I wonder if you're familiar with the concept of balancing advocacy with inquiry? Advocacy is about setting out your case and seeking to be understood. Inquiry is about asking questions, listening and seeking to understand the other person. My insights always come from inquiry: the genuinely curious question or the conversation over coffee whilst I wait with a reluctant leader about to be filmed. These small nuggets suddenly help me see why a leader is resisting or blocking and show me instantly how to work with them.
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This article was originally published in Strategic Communication Management.
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